February 2010
“And the more I hide I realize I’m slowly losing You.”
– Comatose - Skillet
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and...
I finally realize how special that line in Praise You in This Storm is. God gives and takes away when he thinks it will most benefit you. You might be thinking, woah, that’s dumb. Why would He take things from you? Well I experience why today. I didn’t have any money for the concert tonight. And then someone rang the doorbell, and I found an unmarked note.
Jordan,
God will answer...
January 2010
i just realized
I dyed my hair the day you kissed me for the first time. Since then, my hair has faded- like we did.
me: I love myself right now.
him: Good! I do too.
me: Love yourself?
him: You!
More than One
You are all that I am, and You are, all that I hoped for, and You’re not, even describable. I can’t touch You but I know You’re here.
Everyone thinks I’m wrong. Everyone is shutting me off. I’m not the only one. Because I’m not the only one.
At least, at least, I’m not the only one who knows that
You are all that I am, and You are, all that I hoped for,...
my mom just offered the last of her money for me...
I looked at her, told her she was worth more than a concert, and left. I went into my room, grabbed the six dollars left from last night, and gave it to her. She kept repeating God will provide. But He also asks things from us; and, I knew what I had to do. Tonight at six I am going to sit cross-legged on my computer chair with the lights off in my room. I’m going to listen to the band...
i really wanted to go to that concert tonight.
But I don’t have twelve dollars. Neither does my mom. We’re broke. Not the we’re-broke-because-we’re-saving-up-for-your-college-fund broke; no, we’re really broke. My mom’s been out of work for a while because of a physical disability called MS, and I don’t have a dad. I’m scared to death. I want her to have everything, but at the same time, I want...
imonlydreaming:
those few words meant a lot,even if you were semi delirious,i can kinda tell you meant it. i love you, :)
“i felt like a snake,
perhaps a bit afraid
of the brandnew serpent
commanding...”
– Ellen Hopkins
yesterday was more than i could've asked for.
I met a lot of cool people, won the math test in the youth division, got a medal because of it, and it snowed. Someone had been joking about it, and then another said it was just rain when I had gotten my hopes up. So I prayed, I don’t know why, but I did. Then we got out at the place, when we first arrived, and it was snowing. Real snow. Little flurries, but still. It was Jesus’ way...
“I wanted to be that breath of fresh air,
When everything smelled so insincere....”
– Note to Self - From First to Last
i'm excited and nervous and happy all at the same...
I’m going to a huge Nazarene youth Arts day. I’m excited because I love Jesus and I really like the Arts; I’m nervous because I’m going to representing Crossroads youth; and, I’m happy because, well, I’m going to be praising Jesus all day! I feel so small, and childish, but still, this is going to be fun.
come be the fire inside of me
14543.) Everytime you speak of love, I like to...
14533.) Sometimes I stare at you and just think "I...
i can't help but
imagine myself in the passenger seat of your truck, every day, scolding you for your smoking habit but still letting it go on. i imagine myself leaning back against the seat and smiling, admiring your lack of dignity and knack for lip syncing stupidly while you drive. but i love it all, and you, and that’s even true now. you’re like my big brother. never forget that. i love you for...
“Now I’m on my own side.
It’s better than being on your side....”
– It Ends Tonight - All-American Rejects
CONGRATULATIONS.
you broke my heart. if i could, i’d curse at you a million times and more. but what will that do? i’m still going to care. i’m still going to miss you. i’m still going to love you.
i once told you that you were going to hurt me like he did. the situation was far too similar. i’ve never hated being right so much before in my life.
I claim that I'm an insomniac, but actually,
I’m staying awake just for our nightly phone calls. Even when they don’t happen. And they haven’t in a while. And you may be wondering why I stayed up even before I met you. I was still lingering on his phone calls, too.
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is...”
– Ephesians 4:29
and it hit me, like a wave crashing against a sea...
and it ran through my veins; i absorbed every ounce of the knowledge into my being, and it coursed through me, until it reached me, my soul, my heart, myself. and even though i’m happy, and even though i have a God who loves me, and even though i joked about it for so long, it’s still true, and i’m afraid, but this is real. i saw the picture of you and her and i knew. i’m being left...
formspring.me
youandyourpsychobabblebullshit:
brickismypetturtle:
HOW BOUT THEM SAINTS
I’M SO HAPPY THE RED SOX ARE GOING TO THE SUPER CUP
Ask me a question, I’ll make fun of you :3
WOO LET’S HERE IT FOR THE RED SEX
It’s Red Sex, stupid.
“Jesus wept.”
– John 11:35
finally restarting that book that i'm going to...
today I was contacted by the pastor of a Nazarene...
and I was asked to play in a concert band they were going to try to get together. The responsibility and the distance overwhelms me. Still, I’m honored all the same, and I’d love to. But I’m scared to death, and I don’t know how to say no to anyone. The last time I said no to an opportunity like this, I lost the chance of a lead role and I regretted it. I’m just going...
“Joy is permanent as happiness is fleeting.
Joy. The j is for Jesus who is...”
– (via withoutalittlesoul)
Life changing night. And it's not one of those...
foroncehearmeout:
He is jealous for me, Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree, Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy. When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory, And I realize just how beautiful You are, And how great Your affections are for me. And oh, how He loves us oh Oh how He loves us, How He loves us all He is jealous for me, Loves like a...
this is it. i've finally broken down. i've finally...
I’ve cried my last tears tonight. I’ve had the last of my selfish thoughts. From now on, I’m living for Jesus and Jesus only.
“You may be the only Bible some people will ever read”
“you can’t expect the worse out of everyone, jordan.”
“Your broken, your play
your words, they break.”
– White Avenue
14441.) I don't miss you.
(via blogsecret)
http://www.formspring.me/jordanisthebeat
just because you can.
“I love you for who you used to be, who you are now, and for who you are going to...”
– (via walterthegreat)
14495.) I love you, there.
blogsecret:
I said it. I imagine all sorts of scenarios, dreaming that one day we WILL be together. I don’t even know why I like you so much, I can’t help it yet I can’t let go. I want things the way they used to be. Me and you, best friends. Late night phone calls, flirting, all that jazz. It hurts to know you treat a bunch of other girls just the same as me. It feels like I’m always the last...
you might've noticed, but,
I get into these times where I become extremely dramatic. You know, I know, they know. It’s just who I am. I’m so open that everything I say is heard for a mile, and when I’m feeling a great degree of emotion, I tend to exploit that. I’m never mean, though; actually, I’m going to work on that. Because I am sometimes, and I absolutely regret and hate every rude word...
14512.) I got in way too fucking deep.
(via blogsecret)
Blair: Then how can you be so sure?
Chuck: Because you believe in me.